I have been having a real hard time lately balancing all my roles, goals, must-do lists, and want-to do lists. Not to mention finding me time in there. So I have created some things for myself, and I wanted to share them with everyone else in case others are having a hard time balancing work, school, family, life, family, kids, school, work, house stuff, kids, and all the rest of the fun stuff that comes with being a working mom. But this doesn't just apply to working moms, all moms - and dads - have to balance a tremendous amount of things.
John Locke said that you are one person, and at different times in your life different aspects of your person will come to the forefront. This is essential to remember: The same person who works is the person who is a mom. Don't try and separate the two, but try to be the person you need to be when you need to be it.
This means it is okay to take time out of your work day - like your lunch break - to call the sitter for Friday night date-night, to pay the bills, to take a walk around the block so you get your exercise in, to listen to music, to research what your child is going to do this summer. Don't feel bad about doing it on "company time" because lunch hour isn't company time. You aren't getting paid for it, do what you need to do.
Kids need exercise too. Sometimes they just need to get outdoors. That can mean tossing them in a stroller and walking outside with them. Not every moment of their day has to be filled with "doing" something. Taking them for a walk, or a bike ride, can be a way to teach them to enjoy the world around them.
Organize yourself. If you are organized, everything else can be organized too. If you don't know where your keys, purse, clothes, etc are, how can you expect your kids to know?
A two-year old does know where his shoes are, where his clothes are, what he is supposed to be doing, and how to clean. No kid is too young to clean. Give them a rag with water, and have fun wiping the floor, kitchen counters, or table down. As they get older, let them strap sponges to their feet. Who cares how it gets cleaned, getting it cleaned is the important part.
Make decisions and let them go. Don't harp on what you should've done. Just accept what you did do, and move on.
Extras in the car are a good idea. This means an extra pair of shoes for you, clothes, food, snacks, and diaper bag. Anything that might get ruined while you are out should have an "extra" in the car. And if you think shoes cannot get ruined, let me tell you that kid poop does weird things. Keep an extra pair in the car.
And finally - use what works. You have to do this to maintain your sanity. If this means your children want yogurt and applesauce four days in a row, well, there are worse things they could eat. If this means that night clothes are actually the favorite Elmo shirt and dinosaur pants, instead of the nifty pajamas, that's fine too.
But devote quality time to what you are doing. Actually focusing for 30-60 minutes on one task can get it done quicker than if you tried to do three things at once.
I multi-task all the time. When I need to get reading done for my comprehensive exams, I read to my son. He likes to read, I need to read. So what if he hears "institutional presidency" and "rent-seeking behavior" and vocabulary words that most college students don't use? Reading is never put to waste.
But enjoy life. Don't forget that life isn't just a series of lists to complete (although I do love my lists) but there is enjoyment in life too.
No comments:
Post a Comment